Praise To The Man

(Written: October 21, 2013)

You ever read your journal and realize.. huh.. lots has happened in only about 3 months? I had that today. I read my journal of the time I was in the mtc. For everyone that plans on serving a mission, just expect that it won't be what you are expecting. Working with the people will be different, the schedule will feel different. Spoiler Alert: being a missionary is just not what you expect.

Is life ever really what you expected it to be though, do things ever go the way you imagined. There isn't a person in the world whose life is exactly what they thought it would be.

Nevertheless (my new favorite scripture word) Heavenly Father has things planned out a little better than we do.

When I was small boy I dreamed of basketball and fame, not as much about mission. I was thinking about what playing for thousands of fans would be like, not what working all day just to find one person would be like. And for all that, I am grateful that Heavenly Father did. That he saw in me something more than I did.

We often think that our imagination of ourselves is the best way it could go. More and more I see that the plan Heavenly Father has is so infinitely better, so beyond our capacity to create or believe that what we imagine is often the very best we can yet conceive of. Yet we have a Father who sees nothing short of eternity, and captures all the details held within.

I want to thank everyone for the prayers and support that has been given me. I am humbled to think that people who have much more difficult times and bigger issues to deal with than just being hot and working hard, have prayed and thought about me. I pray for each of you, I didn't really know how prayers could be different, then Heavenly Father sent me on a mission. You start to pray more earnestly, quoting the bible. So know that you have the prayers of missionaries with you, with all the new missionaries in the world, that is a lot of more earnest prayers, I hope you see and look for the blessings that come, you WILL have to search but they are there.

monday my week started out with us biking in from an appointment and seeing the words "keep the faith" on this taxi. in ghana all the tro tros and the taxis have little quotes or bible sayings on them, nyame adom is pretty popular. but it is nice to have these little pep talks that sometimes come, sometimes I think they are not as coincidental as they look to me.

Tuesday in our district meeting, Elder Nelson gave instruction on becoming a consecrated missionary. that is a term that is getting thrown out more and more in our mission. the difference in those that murmur, manage and prosper. I'll talk more about that soon.

But we went to work on tuesday and contacted several people in the morning, I even saw an obruni from lebanon and decided "hey I should try and teach at least one obruni on my mission haha" so we went to talk and he politely said he was a muslim, I said he is still a Child of God and our message is for him. He said that religion is a choice for anyone and any religion will do. A surprisingly ghanaian answer. Still I am glad I tried to talk to an obruni, it is different trying to talk with them then with the people of ghana. with ghanaians you use such a different approach to talk with people. I don't know how to explain it but if you see me in 21 months and I can't say anything normal to you just smile and nod :)

a lot of lessons fell through that morning. we did contact a lot of people though which is good, we need to find more people that are ready to be serious, and plant more seeds, you just never know who is ready for this and whose time is not yet. We did teach a lesson down by Perpetual's place to a lady named Juliana. We have been trying to meet her for some time and finally got the chance, it went great! As our lesson finished Ghana's match against Egypt began. We heard a cheer as we walked away from her area towards Perpetual's. Ghana scored. We ate there some nigerian food called eba which I got some pictures of because it is hard to describe..basically it is a dough of stuff called gaurry and you cook it and stew and you put the eba in the stew with bare hands and eat.. maybe ill bring home gaurry at the end of my mission and cook it. will see how many people like it, i didn't at first but now I love it! good thing I have a nigerian comp who can make it. so as we ate we heard people screaming and cheering about five more times, just loud enough to hear through all the area and we couldn't believe that they were cheering for goals. we finished and then a drunk old guy ran in cheering about ghana winning 6-1! he kept saying "o ghana we know football, we are small but we know how to really play, best in africa!!" haha o ghana :) the eba was a sweet deal too! only 2.5 gh cedi for a huge plate!  so after the lesson we headed to Bismarks house. On the way we met Lawson who said he went for a stroll trying to find the truth. I felt prompted to leave a copy of the Book of Mormon so we did. still havent met with him but there was this feeling of being exactly where I should be in the universe.

On wednesday we had what I call "deep sea fishing" as we tried to get out to the far end of the area and see who we could find. Now cantonments area is huge. Like to bike to one end of the area and back could take a couple hours. So we biked halfway and walked towards Spintex road. that isn't the far reaches of our area but on the other side of the airport is just these big houses that aren't finished (and won't ever be finished, not in this generation atleast) with sqauters living there. so spintex and the accra mall is about as far as people are. 

We walked out there and talked to about 30 people that day. Some were cool lessons and others it was obvious they didn't care haha but we kept trying and were able to meet a lot of people. We sent most of them out as referrals to other areas but that is just helping the other laborers in the vineyard :) We were starving so we got some small food that wasn't enough. so as we walked back we were pretty exhausted. as we taught a lesson to Desomds friend we left hungry. I was praying to be a better missionary, and be able to still teach well even though I was hungry, I guess Heavenly Father knew that wasn't happening haha because just then we bumped into a lady who said "hey i know you! you are the elders! i stay with one who fellowships in your church. You are doing good work" then she dashed us a meat pie! The best part was the meat pie actually had way good meat in it. if you come to ghana don't buy the meat pie from the fanice guy, it doesn't have meat in it. but this great lady gave us these awesome meat pies! she stays far from us so we can't meet again but hopefully she will listen to the missionaries we are sending to her :) That night we were able to teach sadat and bismark again which were both good lessons. I was feeling pretty exhausted though and frustrated with how many people we talked to who just kinda shrugged of the seriousness of the message. You would speak of the restoration and as you talked about joseph smith they would just kinda nod there heads and move on. sometimes you just wish they could feel it, that your words would mean something to them, and often they do. but it's sad seeing people brush it off. The blessings that can come and the hope they need is right here, and I pray that more people will feel that, but everyone has there agency.

The next day my morning study helped to refocus me though, and I sent a letter to mom and elise and one for ryan.. I still don't have an address for him sorry! We talked to a lady named auntie gina, who lives in mobile force and had a great lesson with her, she is pretty insightful and as we talked about the book of mormon and lehi leading his family from jerusalem she stopped and said "o, lehi is like somehow noah, leading people out!" I was like... ummm yaa wow hadn't thought of that but ya great example! there is a letter that could be written about that little thought there but maybe another time. Later that day as we got dinner at the apartment we listented to some talks. I have jon bytheway on my ipod and we listen to him out here a lot and any other talks we can get. I actually use stuff I learn from them and I would encourage all of you to find some time to listen to things like that instead of the radio. I have to work to apply it to my investigators but it is crazy how i learn something and then a few hours later I will use it. which was the case that day as I taught a lesson about something we learn in the war chapters of the book of mormon. it really helped Perpetual.

friday morning we went out to teshie for my companion to get his patriarchal blessing. I had to wait outside but it was great to see ghana in the morning, not inside the apartment :). we got to take the tro tro back which was pretty funny haha something america totally needs is tro tro's. they are like small buses or huge vans that are just everywhere! Well later that day we talked to Abena, who we meet earlier that week. as we talked to her about the restoration it is such a sweet moment to feel the strength of my words. I felt the song praise to the man in my heart. I felt the peace of knowing I was where I should be. Sharing the greatest words I could at that moment. and I want you all to know that I do know Joseph smith was and is a prophet of God. He did see our maker and our savior face to face. I died a martyr for the same reason the savior did, the eternal salvation of man.

Praise to the man.

each time I think of this I am reminded of when landon and I sang this song as small boys. I am so grateful that I was raised with these songs, with my family. I am grateful I had the chance to sing that song with Landon. one day he will be 'singing' it out here in the field. I hope you share that message with all those that you can, the restoration needs to happen on a personal level just as much as it had to happen on the world level. 

As that day continued I had that strong with me and it will continue to be, I pray forever.

We met with bismark that night and expalined to him the some of the commandments. his determination to keep them impressed me.

saturday morning I ran into an old email from the President about not murmuring. it was regarding missionaries who complain, survive, and thrive or as the scriptures would say murmur, manage, and prosper. I then read in 1 nephi 3:5-8 some great stuff. Nehpi doesn't murmur, Lehi says he is blessed for it. In verse 7 he bears his testimony that he has gained because he didn't murmur and because he prayed ( 1nephi 2:16) for faith. in verse 8 lehi is excited and glad. He says nehpi is blessed. yet why is he blessed? he is still over 15 1/2 chapters from his 'promised land'. how are we blessed when we haven't reached the end? 

because he didn't murmur. because nephi trusted in the Lord and did all he could to find things to be grateful for. 

It can be hard to not murmur, to be consecrated to the Lord. A talk I heard later that day from neal a. maxwell talks about how in the church we say things like "trials and challenges make you stronger, and God loves you". he says they are true and yet have become trite sayings. that we forget the implications of a loving Heavenly Father, or the grace of Jesus Christ. That we don't realize how hard those challenges are. how they make us stretch. how easy it is to talk about them and how so hard it is to do them. because we have a loving Heavenly Father we will have to face challenges, that if we could pray them away all the work we had done until then would be for nothing. How those who would feel happy in Heaven would be those who had pressed on. another talk that day was about Grace and how because of grace Jesus can ask us to do things. Not to pay him back, the debt is paid in full. yet to feel worthy to be there. Those who will be in Heaven will be those who want to be. It will be the savior, not people, pleading for us to stay there. we won't beg to be let in, but he will beg for us to not want out because we feel unworthy. 

on sunday sister robinson from america talked about her little daughters getting shots to come to ghana. how they cried and she had to comfort them saying "it will only be a moment and it will make you stronger". she talked about how the same words are coming from heaven.

Another line that I found in the talks that day was "i have been saved by grace, but have you been changed by grace?" grace has the power to change us to raise us up over any challenge. you have never sunk bellow his love or his help, your mistakes do NOT take you from his grace. in fact the repitition and the trials you have faced make you the person the grace is for. it is to change you, you can never repay the savior. you pay him by coming to him. (3 nephi 12:3)

I wish i could say more but i have got to go to work :) me ko yuma.

I love you all and  hope you invite the missionaries over, that you offer to be a member present lesson for them. that you refer people to them. we are all enlisted. Landon try and go out with the missionaries sometime.

hey dad I heard new kid in town on friday haha!

love you all sorry this letter is rushed and unfinished but i hope this week is great! see you soon!

Elder Van Wagoner

I Love To See The Temple

(Written: October 14, 2013)

Hey everyone!

Well last week i know I scared everyone but don't worry! I am feeling better and it was some dehydration with a cold on top. Lots of people in Ghana are getting some sickness somehow similar to what I was dealing with. They say it happens as hammartan (said like hammah tin) approaches, or the hot season. In december we see the sharaian winds blow down from the north and warm up western africa. which means only one thing...... hot wife points.

anyways congrats to whit and ryan for entering the field and for elder jensen on finally being able to go to argentina! it is an honor to be considered a missionary with the likes of you, I definitely don't feel like i am on the same level as each of you but thank you.

So this week was a growing experience.

Monday, after email, we went out to teach Paul. It went super long and I was pretty worn from being sick. i got frustrated with him asking the doubter question about the book of Mormon. well not so frustrated with him as just tired of the forever long lesson. I love questions but I love when they actually have real intent. with paul we are trying to lead him to a sincere prayer. we have given him all the scriptures, showing that God has a body, that men have seen him 'face to face' ect. but as we learn in james 5:9 (and I just love this verse so much, I use it a ton when I teach because in Ghana we have the issue of people not praying sincerely, just praying how the pastor taught them) but the witness of God is greater! Paul is in a position many of us get in. there comes a time when we are backed to the wall and have to take the leap of faith. Sure the Gospel can answer questions but as sister Judd (the mish pres wife) taught me "if you can intellectualize your way into the gospel, you can intellectualize your way out of the Gospel." so he is at the point where he needs to test God, or prove him. I hope that it doesn't take the financial disaster he is headed for for him to be humble enough, but I would rather it be that then he never comes to receive the witness of God. I suppose the same goes for each of us, that we don't need to be compelled to humility, find faith in him now. we left for the apartment that night and I felt a little tired of the week already but I will show you how the Lord blesses those poor in spirit who come unto him. as we got home, i felt lifted as I talked with the elders in the apartment and my companion, and ate some food (being sick made me not hungry, but at paul's i felt two days worth of not being hungry suddenly come back to me haha Van Wagoner's and their food).

so tuesday we had ztm (zone training meeting) on the way back, Elder Ballard and I (not the ga but his grandson who is on mission with me, he is from WX) we talked about some mexican place we plan on double dating at in 2 years in north salt lake. I forget the name but if anyone finds it, they have food like cafe rio but half the price. we dropped him and elder didericksen off in osu and headed back. That day we had some good lessons but especially one that started with a man named Sadat. he lives and works by perpetual. as we sat with him and his brother, more and more men began to come and sit with us. some we had planned for and others just showed up! it was so sweet as I watched a mini version of the gathering of Israel. We were teaching the restoration and as the end came the spirit directed a testimony I bore to them. there was a power and words I didn't know I could use (simplicity is key out here and it really makes you learn the gospel on it's most foundational level, which is great) I watched as several skeptic men had there hearts opened to two small boys, even one of them being obruni. it was such a tender mercy and I felt carried by the spirit that night.

Wednesday morning was our temple trip! I woke early to a bunch of Elders in the apartment compound and we left for our session. I was praying for all english so we could see the new video. as we entered I felt a peace and at home feeling I havent felt on my entire mission. I love to see the temple. as we sat in the session room waiting for it to start, i looked for the dreaded headphones (people wear headphones for translation, the only video that has translation into many ghana languages like twi, ewe, ga, fanti, and even french is the old one). I looked row by row and on the last row, there they were. it would be the old one and it was because one person needed headphones.

I was bitter and wanted to ask him to leave haha. I thought, I work hard, i am a missionary, can't we just get to see the video? as things began, I watched him fumble the headphones and drop them as he tried to work his set. I felt some compassion as I saw the stress lines in his face. I wasn't the only one who needed the blessings of the temple. I put aside the bitter and saw him with some love and was grateful he was there for this. where else could he get the peace and answers he needs? The session became much more enjoyable and I felt peace. upon entering the celestial room i felt to read in alma 37, as i did new understanding of the Atonement entered my life. I realized that I was all alone. for the first time in 2 months. upon finding such a rare moment I knelt down and began to pray. the spirit i felt and the thinness of the veil is something i can never forget. I was not alone, but upheld and carried by the family past and future. our family is a great one, especially eternally speaking. that is a moment I will never forget. I left the temple feeling love.

We came back and began the interviews. I was pretty early in the line up and so i entered in. President began by saying "i will make a prophecy: there will come a day when you won't want to go home. you will rise each day excited to be a missionary." i was stunned by this. I had always dreamed of this but could hardly hope for such a message. as we talked i let him know that my mission wasnt what i had expected he talked of how abraham was asked to sacrifice isaac. I too was asked to sacrifice my fantasy of missionary work in order to find the more beautiful one the Lord has created for me. I asked what I could do right now he answered 'dont whine, not even too yourself, I know you don't but when the thoughts of whining come, push them out and be grateful' there is a surprising power i have since found in those words. as i began to leave he talked of how i would one day carry leadership and to prepare myself for that day, I used to want that but as I watch my leaders out here, somedays it would be nice if we could go in cruise control, but that is not how it works. right as I stepped out he asked if the Book of Mormon was the center of my studies. I said, usually i read preach my gospel and study the scriptures it directs me to and that i find. he said that was good but to stop it and change to Book of Mormon study for my personal study. so i did.

The next morning, thursday i began study of the book of mormon from page one. I learned a lesson from lehi in verses 6-8. notice that he is overwhelmed after he sees and hears much and then he comes to cast him self upon his bed. many times we all do this, life over whelms us, we will want to rest or to quit and be done. yet in verse 8 is the miracle of missionary work, and the miracle of anyone who will push onward. Lehi is carried by the spirit.

as i talked about early the Lord blesses the poor in spirit who come unto him. when you are tired and want to quit, keep pushing upward, the Lord will then carry you. similar to peter walking on water in matthew 14. somedays we are walking on water,but inevitably we begin to sink as life and fear creeps in. yet only then does the savior carry us. "and immediately he stretched forth his hand". My study of the Book of Mormon has opened up my teaching like never before, I find answers to my daily questions and strength to do his will. I had forgotten a truth I know beyond doubt: "the Book of Mormon is true". I pray that each of us will make it the center of our studies, our homes, our families. Make it the foundation that you build on, teach on and stand on. there will be answers and love found therein. please open the book. please. the bible is great and you can never discredit that or the doctrine and covenants or the pearl of great price. but the book of mormon is the most correct of anybook on earth and will bring men closer to God than ANY other book. I know that it is true. I invite everyone to 1. read 2. ponder in your heart the message it contains and 3. pray and ask God, very specifically if it is true. he will then answer you as we learn in the introduction page and in moroni 10:3-5. the still small voice will testify and teach. and this is the answer to every question you have. how crazy is that. i have every answer you need. it is called:

The Book of Mormon

Another Testament of

JESUS CHRIST 

as for the rest of the day we taught some great lessons. my ability to teach even from the bible has increased by study of the book of mormon. one funny moment was when we were headed in for the night and a drunk guy came up to me as we passed miriams and started talking about how he loved us english people, we had love and he just thought it was great and he kept almost falling over so i had to pretty much carry him haha man that was a great moment. o Ghana!

friday was a pretty average day, so by that i mean not average at all because it is africa, but we taught 3 member present lessons with a guy named chinnydoo who is a sweet rm who served like 3 years ago in my mission haha man he is a stud.

Saturday we had some great lessons and even one with a chief inspector, who i didn't realize was chief inspector because he was just chilling in his boxers outside of his house (side note clothes are some how optional and yaa..) but he likes the book of mormon! which is great :) but my comp was getting pretty tired since he somehow has a small small sickness like everyone does right now. so he had to sit for a little bit but i was able to go and talk to a few people i felt prompted to find. that night we taught Sadat and a few of the guys again and we finished at bismark who is so sweet! such a humble guy, man i love him. his wife wanted to listen but she only speaks twi so bismark was translating for us and i was throwing out what ka ka ka kra twi i know. but still great lesson.

sunday is church day which rocks! why is church only 3 hours?? but bismark and sadat came to church, no other investigator so we won't reach our baptismal goal which is sad because we worked way hard for it but more to come on that next week. after church we planned according to the new standards of planning we learned in ztm and it was really cool to see the Lord guide us as we looked at what everyone really needs and how we can bring it to them. we taught bismark and i even taught his daughter how to do some math she was working on (thanks grandpa for putting up with me, I taught her fractions :)) so we finished at paul and i used a bunch of stuff i learned in my Book of Mormon study that really kinda... confounded him.. wow hadn't realized the whole 2 nephi scripture coming into play there. pretty cool.. alright well anyways we had somehow b.l.t. s for dinner and finished up the week playing uno haha man spongebob uno is the best thing ever. by the way bakko is uno in twi for those of you who care.

Elder lloyd was like do i have to draw four? and we said no just one so he drew one because you can't end on a special card and then as he draws it elder nelson goes... "uno.... now you have to draw four" haha man definitely had to be there... email jokes are lame but hey i laughed and enjoyed!

well that was this week, go to the book of mormon and the temple. Jordan wells congrats on getting out our endowment! go as much as you can and read the book of mormon each day! each day everyone :)

i love you all to pieces, dad happy birthday and grandpa too. elise i am sending you a letter and i have letters for ryan and other elders too that i don't have adresses for so i will send them home and hopefully you can get ryans address from the church program.

but i love you all! church is church the book is blue!

Elder Van Wagoner

I Hope They Call Me On A Mission!

Adorable. 

One of Logan's new favorite foods! (Can you say Miracle?? He hates fish!)

(Written October 7, 2013)

What a crazy week, we worked hard, saw the ups and downs, talked with some solid people, and lived in africa haha.

monday was pretty sweet, email was solid with you all and sav getting her blessing helped me a lot, thinking about my own blessing and my mission call pumped me up. That night our appts. dropped so we ended up spending our time contacting and trying to set times for tomorrow.

Tuesday was october! the start of a new month. we had our district meeting and as we talked about our goal of 4 baptisms I felt overwhelmed.. we don't have more than two people who are moving daily towards baptism. but I trust in God, not my doubts. So hopefully we can work hard enough to reach the goals we set with him. But as we worked that day we did infact have success, we taught about 6 great lessons and had 4 new investigators :) as we went out to meet one, whose name is perpetual, we found our selves in the somehow bush of Cantonments.

This area is in the picture of me with perpetual and obot. It is just a field and broken tiny homes with a couple small shops and no light. but as we taught (or rather my comp did, since they all spoke the same nigerian language) i heard 'it's time' on the radio! it was so weird to hear it out here and to be in that position. I heard some others I didn't know so I guess I am coming to the time when I don't recognize new things now.. sweet! :) That night we got to meet with Akua (a-qee-ah) she is so good and humble.

On wednesday we played water bottle football in the a.m. which we are doing a lot now, i love it. but president judd then texted my comp and I and said he wanted to go teach with us. As we planned for that we found that we are not supposed to contact in military barracks.. which is a problem since most of our area is barracks, it means we have to find more people on the streets, which is too bad because you don't exactly meet families on the street. So president came with us to a lesson with a man named brenya and his nephew afreyia. It was so sweet! he really showed me how to teach and connect with love. I hope I can be more like that man. hey he teaches at BYU so when i go back.. maybe maybe haha we also taught Akua that day and her niece and nephew, so we taught it like a primary lesson, Akua can't read, so we had the small boy read for us and it was actually a pretty great lesson. We also met with bismark, it was way late so it was short but it was really good, that man is prepared and has been to church twice so in a couple weeks he will be baptized! :)

Thursday was tricky because the majority of our lessons fell through but we kept going and had some good ones. we waited for a couple guys at the temple grounds for a while because "they were coming" you can't really trust that saying around here, if they do come after saying that it is like an hour and a half later. but we did get out for a couple more really good lessons. we saw linda and laticia, they got confirmed this sunday, it was great :)

Friday we were in kanda in the morning and some people said "obruni!.. come preach to us o?" so we did but like most times if the lessons start that way they have a tendency to not take you seriously at all. one of them we connected well with but she is moving to tema. We went to teach richard and abuot which were some solid lessons, I can see they feel it is true but they are just struggling to find the will to follow God. most people think any church will do. but we taught abuot about finding an answer through prayer and he was so surprised about the still small voice. he said "i never knew God spoke this way, maybe this is how he is speaking to me" it was great to really see someone be changed. we teach a lot of lessons but it is not so often that you will particularly see change in people. some who are baptazied didn't need much change, but those that we struggle and pray for, I see big differences in them. those are the elect, many people forget that stubborn people can become the strongest, they just need God to convince them.

We went and got food at a place called 'fast food' in this market. it was funny listening to the awful music and thinking, huh i'm on my mission. I started humming the song 'I hope they call me on a mission' and got a big boost, i do everytime i sing that song. (d and c 25: 12) we saw a man named paul who is having a hard time trusting in God, he relies on the arm of the flesh to answer his questions so each time we talk we have to come back to verses like james 5:9 and remind him why we are there, but i really hope he gives God his chance, he just doesn't see what he is missing out on yet. we went to linda and laticia and I got a runny nose starting there. luckily i felt prompted to bring my hankie (for the first time on mission haha thanks Aunt Brenda for doing the embroidery it looks great!)

On saturday I Got worse, we taught a lot but i struggled to focus. finally that night i barely made it through our last three lessons. but with paul I promised if he came to church that he would be able to make it financially, as I felt prompted to do. we made it to linda and laticia and finally to bismark. I really wanted to be done, but i knew he deserved a visit. the next morning I was pretty wasted, my body was aching and I was doing the whole.. shoot I can't see straight thing haha, I laughed and sang I hope they call me on a mission. I flicked the ants out of my pants (literally Ghana has plenty ants) because i felt prompted to check them before I put them on.. good thing haha we had an elder get bit by some after he towled off the other day, so pretty funny. ants are just one of the things you laugh about :) so we went to church and saw the confirmation of linda and laticia! also a man named couch that the AP's had taught (they serve in our ward as well) it was a great testimony meeting, our bishop talked about referrals since linda and laticia where his referrals and he was very gracious. that man is so great! we had brother Kweku and Bismark come and i was so glad to see them. I kept having to say no to hand shakes because I thought I had the flu.

So two hours later we finish church, great meetings but I couldn't stand or sit with out about falling over anymore. so we went to the apartment and I got into shorts and passed our for like 6 hours haha had crazy dreams and woke up thinking.. "huh is this my mission or where am I?" man that was so crazy. so i texted sister judd who is the medical person and she said I was dehydrated and to drink till I couldn't, then drink some more. well I started drinking and felt a bit better. I finished off like 3 liters in a few hours and slept great! this morning I was still pretty out of it, but we got wakye and I drank about 4 more liters of water and started to get a lot better. mom we sang 'i'm dreaming of white christmas' me and elder nelson and a bunch of other old shows like that haha it was great.

but as i got better I realized how much I wanted to go and work, how grateful I was to be healthy. I had been praying all week to adjust to mission life and really love it. oddly enough the sickness somehow helped. I was relying on God more, I wanted to work more and I was able to get out of a sort of mental rut I have been in. weird way to have prayers answered but hey, I trust in him.

I know this week has been tough for everyone but I hope conference helped. I have been praying all week/ my whole mission for you guys and I want you to know that I love you and that Heavenly Father does too.

My advice is a quote I was reminded of "if you don't feel like praying, pray until you feel like praying" solid advice. God is waiting to be answered and he is looking to bless our efforts at every turn.

Although I was sick, I felt lifted, I was not biking alone, I was not trying to walk alone. and don't worry about my being sick, it wasn't like so sick I thought I was going to die, just the sick that keeps you in bed.. which sucks cause that's a day I can't get back. O well, I learned from it and I can help others more now. Mission is so tied to the atonement that it is crazy! 

Elise I got your dear elder and mom yours with it! thanks so much for thinking of me, I know everyone is busy but it means a lot to me :)

keep on keeping on family, remember what mom taught us years ago "and it came to pass" "it didn't come to stay" those words echo with me each day. it is true, the clock doesn't stop for the good or the bad, so soak it all in. learn all you can. take pictures. you'll be glad you did.

I love you all more than words and am eternally grateful to be eternally by your side :)

Elder Van Wagoner

Knock A Third Time

Teaching

Baptisms!

Sleeping on the pillowcase Savanah sewed him!

Grocery shopping in style

(Written: September 30, 2013)

This week went by somehow fast. Days feel like weeks, weeks feel like days... somehow haha but it taught me a lot. each week teaches me a lot. First I have to say, Savanah congratulations! I have been praying all week about your blessing and I am so proud of you and know you have great things in store. You should know that you are serving a mission, you keep me going out here. To everyone reading this, keep trusting in God, I think he knows a little better than we do. :)

Well on monday after emails I was grumpy because the email wasn't working well. So we went off biking to linda and laticia. As we got there I was sitting in a very humid, very warm room, no light, just a small tv from the early 90's maybe late 80's with the volume low to light the room. The little siblings were watching one of the awful ghana movies that look like some one took a phone camera and made a video that is full length haha. so there i sat teacing a lesson in the dark, in a tiny room in a lowly place called nima. The lesson went well and I felt a great peace as i have come to love those girls and really just want them to come unto Christ. We left and rode in the rain to desmonds place and taught him with the rain coming and the mosquiots buzzing (repelent is usless i am finding out, but hey we have the doxy and that works enough) but I felt real good about my efforts that day and we taught desmond about 1 nephi chapter 5. He was concerened about his muslim wife and staying with her. most muslims can't stay with christians, that just doesn't work here. So we taught him about lehi explaining his testimony to help his wife and encourage him to follow the example he was to her. That was eye opening and helped me realized all i can teach out of the Book of Mormon. We rode home in the rain. I love the rain.

Tuesday most of our lessons fell through but we met a few people and we had red red, which i love. finally that night we met linda and laticia again and taught the law of chastity. i felt the spirit testify through me of the love that Heavenly Father has for them and his desire to protect his small girls. It is so important to defend virtue.

Thursday we met a man named bismark who lives in luga. i was tired and frustrated but knew i had to keep pressing on. so finally we met him after being lost forever, and it was so sweet, great lesson on the restoration. I love teaching the restoration, like what an incredible message.

Friday we knocked doors in mobile force and met faustina and taught her about the book of mormon and it was just solid how she saw it could bless her. as we help others liken the scriptures instead of just trying to give them a book it makes such a big difference, only thing is most don't want "another bible". so the rest of the day was a tough, we went to find this guy named richie we got referred to us. he gave us bad directions that took us to ridge hospital than all the way back up to a place near nima. which was like 1 and half hours of biking. the lesson wasn't that great and i was sooo tired. we tried to find some other people but couldn't. so we went ended handed back for some small dinner at the apartment. I just lied in the living room listening to a church talk and eating my rice, when i decided. man two years from now i want to look back at today and be happy. so we went to marcus and taught him about the still small voice in 3 nephi 11 and 1 kings 19. as we spoke about finding answers i felt a still small voice, pleased that i was working so hard. we then went for desmond to help him understand the priesthood, a nice reminder of what power we hold. we also saw matilda and she had a headache so i gave her some of the meds in my backpack mom sent me.. oddly enough that was the first the bottle has been opened. I have been placed to not have headaches out here, some things i have to repent of, frequently, like not being grateful for things like that. each of us has so many anonymous acts of kindness performed by the savior daily, that we wouldn't know of otherwise, the world tragedy's show us that.

saturday we had a lot of trouble finding anyone who cared to listen, we knocked a bunch talked a bunch but just not a lot of success, we went to met a lady named juliana who was referred to us by elder and sister avery. we couldn't find her and couldn't call because we were out of credits on our phone, so i said lets go eat. we got back and ate and called but when we went back she wasn't there. so we left for kanda. However, there was a great moment when we went out to see a man named paul and he wasn't there. As we stood in the dark night in Kanda, I felt very tired. Unfortunately i was being whiney. So as I stood looking out at the view, I decided to go knock some doors, just do anything to stop thinking about home and get back to work. As we went from top to bottom we came to one door where I knocked. The lady gave us a straight up no. which i have never seen before. we call it being 'American'd' because it is a true rejection not the ghana rejection which is like "o i'm coming, then you never see them come or i'll surprise you, then they never do haha. but I was struck dumb it seemed and didn't say what I wanted. So I said "no regrets!" and went to knock again. We left her a pamphlet and I gave a small testimony of the love of God for her, saying how important she was to him that I knock again.

She left us and I felt like I was doing good, we made it to the bottom step and I heard 

"knock a third time". 

so clear and distinct was the still small voice. the same i had been teaching about to marcus last night. I wrote a note and left it for her, but knew that wasnt enough. So I went to get two oranges oranges from miriam, but she said, take three it is a sign of love.  and so we went to deliver them and another note for her. We arrived and found the first note gone, we knocked and no answer came. I waited and waited, we heard her shuffling inside, but she didn't come. so why then is this important, why the title of my email?

Since not much progress has been made with her. But I "knocked the third time". I gave it my all when it was tough, when we faced rejections all day and things were going wrong left and right. each of us can "knock a third time" in life. sometimes the night will be dark and things will just be straight up hard. there is no two ways about it. But please knock a third time, when the spirit calls, answer. I felt such a love and peace. I felt the gratitude of God as I stood alone in the middle of a dark African night. That night I stood taller than any night so far on my mission, because a still small voice urged me on. God is waiting to bless us, we only need to knock a third time.  that may mean going the extra mile to help someone, or giving a smile to a lonely person when we arent feeling to good. but remember: it is the moments when we are most tired that we must push on. the time when you feel broken, alone, forgotten, and beaten upon the rocky shore. Knock a third time. when we make a habit of doing so we will be in the habit of overcoming the trials that will come. go take a look at 1 peter 5 and helaman 5: 12

sunday was a great day with the baptism of linda and laticia, I felt strongly the satisfaction of the Heavens. and also that night as we planned our month for october I felt to pray about our goals. as we did my companion Elder Udofia and I saw very clearly the plans God intended us to lay. It was modern day personal revelation. what an incredible experience, light really cleaves to light, the more you follow the promptings of the spirit, the more you will receive them. it is simple logic.

This week taught me a lot. But I love my family and am so grateful for them. today we talked about how my parents met and about the example my father was to me. not being showy about his wisdom but truly helping me to grow. i am so grateful for you dad and for my family who has raised me right, each member of our family has changed my life and I owe it to you to even be here. :)

I heard country music and thought of you guys. there is a station called V.o.a. or voice of america and i just heard it for the first time and loved it, man i like country music now. mission really changes people. i even like fufu now too... say what? hey if anyone wants to send the best two years soundtrack and such that would be great :)

does uncle max ever read these? I was just thinking about him the other day, can somebody let him know that I love him and I know that Heavenly Father does too. But I got to go so just remember the church is true! I hope i can get a copy of ryans talk maybe soon, but im praying everyday for you all and love you so much :) have a great day and a great week!!